about me

Bleached, yes, and it was three separate sessions weeks apart rather than one heroic afternoon. Anyone promising platinum from dark hair in a single sitting is either lying or about to melt something. Lifting slowly over several appointments is the difference between silver hair and no hair, and I learned that the expensive way.

No, and I say that as someone who did exactly that and had to have it cut into a bob to fix it. Box bleach applies unevenly, you cannot see your own back sections, and the point of no return arrives without warning. If money is the issue, a training night at a college is a fraction of salon prices and supervised.

Toner every ten days or so, purple shampoo twice a week but never left on as long as the bottle suggests, and cooler water than is comfortable. Yellow is not a sign anything is wrong, it is just what bleached hair does as the toner washes out. Treat it as routine maintenance rather than a crisis.

More in time than money. Roots need doing every five or six weeks, toner every ten days, and a proper treatment weekly because bleached hair is structurally compromised whatever anyone sells you. If you are not prepared to build a regular slot into your month, a darker colour will look far better on you than a neglected light one.

It is one line down the centre parting with each side treated completely separately, which is why it has to be sectioned properly rather than freehanded. The hard part is not the colour, it is keeping the line clean as it grows out. Mine gets tidied up every time the roots are done.

Yes, obviously. Anyone with hair this light who says otherwise is either not being honest or has not had it long. It is manageable damage rather than the falling-apart kind — bond treatments, no heat unless something genuinely requires it, and a trim more often than I want. It will never behave like virgin hair again and I made peace with that.

Go into it knowing it is a commitment rather than a haircut. Budget for the maintenance before the first appointment, book a consultation instead of walking in with a photo, and be honest with the stylist about every colour that has ever been on your head, including the box dye from four years ago. That last one matters enormously.

Less than everyone expects and for a much shorter time. It is a sharp, eye-watering couple of seconds and then it is over — your eyes stream and that is a reflex rather than pain. Compared to a cartilage piercing, which aches for weeks, it is genuinely one of the easier ones to get and to heal.

Far longer than the studio's leaflet suggests. Lobes are a couple of months, septum around three, and cartilage can take the best part of a year regardless of how fine it feels at week six. Changing the jewellery too early is the single most common reason a piercing goes wrong, and almost everyone does it.

A needle rather than a gun, always, for anything including lobes. Implant-grade titanium jewellery, not surgical steel. A clean studio that is happy to answer questions, and a portfolio of healed work. If somewhere is cheaper than everywhere else nearby, there is a reason and it is usually the jewellery.

Yes, that is the whole appeal. A horseshoe flips up inside the nose and is genuinely invisible unless someone is looking directly up it, which is not a normal thing for a colleague to do. It is the one facial piercing you can have and still turn up somewhere conservative without a conversation.

Some of them, and honestly not most. A few mark something specific and the rest are just images I liked enough to keep on me forever, which is a completely valid reason that people find oddly disappointing. Not every tattoo needs a story. Some of them are simply nice to look at.

Choose the artist before the design, and look at healed photographs rather than fresh ones. Fresh work always looks flawless; healed work tells you whether the lines hold up after a year. Then wait a month with the idea before booking. Anything that survives a month of waiting will survive a decade of wearing.

Two and a half hours if I am going out properly, and I enjoy about ninety minutes of that. It is not that any single step is slow — it is that getting ready with music on and people around is genuinely the best part of the night, and rushing it to arrive somewhere earlier has never once improved an evening.

Less product, not more. A thin base, proper powder only where it actually shifts, and a setting spray applied in a proper mist rather than three wet blasts to the forehead. Heavy foundation is what slides. And blot rather than reapply, because layering fresh product onto a broken base is what creates the look everyone is trying to avoid.

I do not, first time, ever. Nobody does. The trick is doing both lightly and roughly first, then going back and correcting them against each other, rather than perfecting one and trying to match it. A cotton bud with a little micellar water on it is the actual secret and it does more work than the liner.

Second-hand, years ago, and I have never found the label because it is long gone from the waistband. I get asked this constantly and I hate disappointing people with the answer. Similar things turn up on resale apps regularly if you search by the shape rather than by a brand, which is how I found it in the first place.

Second-hand, patiently, searching by silhouette rather than by brand. Most of what I own was cheap and has been altered — taken in, cropped, or had the hem redone. Learning to use a needle badly has saved me more money than any discount code, and a thing that fits properly looks expensive regardless of what it cost.

No, and this is worth saying. A night out generates enough content for two weeks, so the ratio you see is wildly distorted. Realistically it is a couple of times a month and the rest is me on a sofa. Everybody's feed does this and it is worth remembering when yours feels quiet by comparison.

Leave with the people you arrived with, tell someone where you are, and keep enough on your phone to get home. Boring, and it has never once ruined a night. The chips on the walk back are non-negotiable and are, in my opinion, the actual highlight of the entire evening.

Not the platform name and not mine. OnlyFans bills under a neutral parent-company descriptor precisely because this is the question everybody has. It reads as an unremarkable online purchase. If you share an account with somebody, that is worth knowing before you spend rather than afterwards.

No. There is no post to a feed, no notification to your contacts, and nothing linked to any other account you have. On my side I see a username, which is whatever you chose it to be, and nothing else — no real name, no email address, no card details. That is genuinely the whole picture.

Yes, monthly, and you can switch the renewal off whenever you like, including five minutes after subscribing. Do that and you keep access until the end of the month you have already paid for, then it simply stops. Nobody chases you and nothing is charged again.

Settings, subscriptions, toggle auto-renew off. It takes about ten seconds and does not involve messaging me, emailing anybody, or explaining yourself. I would far rather someone cancelled easily and came back later than felt stuck and resented the whole thing.

I reply. Not instantly and not always at length, because there are a lot of them and I do occasionally sleep, but the messages are mine. If you have written something thoughtful and had nothing back for a couple of days, it has not been ignored — it is in the pile and I will get there.

Same content, free, for a limited number of people. When a trial ends you are not automatically charged — it simply expires and you decide whether to subscribe. Trial links are finite and they go quickly, which is exactly why this site hands them out rather than posting one publicly for scrapers to find.

That is what the free social accounts are for and it is a fair thing to want. What is behind the subscription is the same person doing the same things without the platform-rules edit. If the free material is not for you then the paid material will not be either, and that is a completely acceptable answer.

Sometimes, within limits I set, and always through the platform itself rather than any direct payment. Ask politely and you will get an honest yes or no. Anybody claiming to be me and arranging something through Telegram, gift cards or a bank transfer is not me — that is a scam, without exception.